I’m Sad as Hell and I’m Not Going To Fake it Anymore
Are you feeling stuck?
What if the big block in your way is a simple feeling?
Last weekend, I yodeled (in lieu of tears) at my beloved brother’s memorial.
Two days before that, in the middle lane of the 101 freeway, my car suddenly stopped dead. Like my brother, without notice. She drove great, had way more miles on her, but was off-warranty.
After waiting four hours for a tow, I next had a private open hood wake for my car in the dealership service department.
I know I’m not alone. We are all collectively feeling some kind of loss. Even if everything Is going beautifully for you now, we’ve all lost something. Even if it’s something invisible we cannot see or understand.
“It is what it is,” I kept repeating. Until one day I wondered, “what is it?”
Come to find out, that’s a valuable question.
I had a growing lump of grief in my throat that felt like a fur ball. I knew I was grieving. But the fur ball wouldn’t go away.
Dr. Rachel Goodman from the Cleveland Clinic wrote “naming a feeling helps us move on from it.”
Confucius said, “to be able to name a thing what it is, is the beginning of wisdom.”
In the 1977 movie classic, Network, the prime-time news anchor goes off script and the rails when he tells millions to open their windows and yell: “I’m mad as Hell and I’m not going to take it anymore!” They do and his ratings go through the roof.
A lot of people I speak to now feel “stuck.” And really frightened. How do I get “unstuck?” What to do next? Who am I now?
I could relate and then one day,
I heard myself say simply, “I’m sad.”
In an instant I felt myself again. Without grief, fanfare or shame. Real. Like a child.
A flurry of exciting possibilities whisked away the fur ball.
I called it what it is. Disappointed. Sad. A word I discovered even the dictionaries are afraid to use in naming grief, or forlorn, or any word close to it.
It may sound like what a child would say. Too simple. Possibly weak.
But if you’re feeling it, try saying it. And I’d love to hear what happens to the stuck.
Every feeling passes.
Your best, next best birthing ideas may be stuck under the ones you feel now.
Charlie Brown (of the Peanuts gang) was able to say, “Good grief!” And 70 years later, the brand is still taking in the dough.
I’m not a therapist but I am uniquely qualified to help you cough up fur balls and discover together what is there to get unstuck. We won’t fake it but we will have fun and fast, valuable insights for immediate change. There’s gold under there.
If this feels right to you, give me a chance please to help you.
Send me a brief email today and lets set up a cost-free call.
Thanks!
And last thing: if you like what you’re reading, will you forward it onto others you think can benefit from the insights themselves?